Day in the life of...

My day starts at 130am if we are being completely accurate. Ian gets Ruby from her cot and puts her into bed with me to feed on his way to get Oli and sleep in the spare room. They have got their crying schedules in unison woo. Lucky us. 

It's about 430am when Ruby is going on and off the boob in my sleepy haze I just keep trying to put it back in! She's crying intermittently and I don't know why. Eventually I realise she has a belly ache, sit up to cuddle her and she has such a windy belly and now a huge dirty nappy. I leave her for ten mins or so as it just keeps coming and coming. Then it dawns on me! Last night I got a tad carried away and pigged out on chocolate. Woops! A familiar feeling of regret falls over me, similar to when you wake up after a night of drinking and feel ashamed of your actions! Well I certainly won't be doing that again it isn't worth it because now it's 5am and I'm waiting for Rubes to finish filling her pants so I can go back to sleep. 

445....Should I bother going back to sleep?! It's light out and I wouldn't mind a cuppa...

446 ..Nup! Sleep wins no one is going to give me a prize for getting up early in fact Ian will probably give me zero sympathy at 3pm when I'm literally DYING from getting up at this foolish hour. 

5....Lay down and Ruby gets back on the boob and we both fall asleep.

7....I can hear Ol's elephant feet running through the house. Banging and banging his trains on the tracks. Ruby stirs and back onto the magic boobs and she is back to sleep in no time! I slip in and out of sleep interrupted by Ol turning the clothes dryer on and off. 

830...Ol is shouting for toooost tooost and Ruby is waking up next to me. I feel dead! Ever since I started laying down to feed i feel like I'm sleeping all night, it's amazing! Co sleeping for the WIN! Being awake for an hour really took it's toll! The me of 3 weeks ago would slap me right now if she heard me saying that. 

845...Laying in bed looking at my phone Ruby playing about. Come out to the loungeroom and Ol looks at us and spits his water over the floor. He's been doing this a bit lately. He is excited to see me then when he sees I have Ruby he has to do something to show he isn't happy. 

9 ...Having tea and toast on the couch with Ol next to me and Ruby on my lap. Ol is pulling down my top and trying to force Ruby's head to my boob and saying dink dink dink.

930-1030 We all get dressed, feed, nappies done and head for the door. It's easy for Ian he just puts the kids in the car and waits. For me I have to get snacks, get creon, get water bottles, shoes, check nappy bag is stocked, lock back door, put alarm on, turn off tv, xmas lights and salt lamp, lock front door then get into the car. Oli's face is covered in vegemite. Ffs really dad? HOW did you miss this?! He looks like an ORPHAN!!!!!

Head off to the markets. The boss is pleased that we are driving past the horses down the road. Not so pleased when we arrive and I tell him he is going in the pram. We walk to markets...Ol is so far away in the front of the double pram that I don't really realise OR am quite possibly ignoring his incessant whining. 

Stroll through the markets, Ian weaves our limo of a pram through the crowd much more efficiently than what I will ever be capable of. The hilly nature of Kalamunda means it's all up down and the five minutes of pushing it reminds me of how unfit I have become!

We grab an almond croissant and Ian waits for our coffees. I take Ol down to watch the christmas carols being sung by an older couple which he would usually love and dance to but today stares at with almost a scowl on his face! Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed! I offer him some croissant he eats a bit then throws the best bit on the ground!!! How dare youuuu!! I think. I LOVE MY ALMOND CROISSANTS! I consider picking it up and eating it but theres too many people around. Too much judgement! Ian comes back with coffees, ol is unhappy as he is convinced my iced coffee is a juice that I am keeping from him. 

We make our way down to the petting zoo and an older lady asks Ian how old Ruby is. I'm not sure if he is just dealing with PTSD from the past 6 weeks home with the 3 of us OR he doesn't want to get into a conversation but he tells granny he isn't sure how old she is. I say six weeks and in response the woman gasps and says 'and you are out at the markets walking around looking all TRIM!' I'm flattered but I wonder what should I be doing????? SIX weeks lady! Life goes on! Can't sit around in my pjs all day, everyday! 6 days a week maybe but not 7! 

Ol's still yelling and protesting about not getting any coffee when we get to the animals. He lays his eyes on the ducks and he practically jumps from the pram into the pen. I breastfeed Ruby nearby and watch everyone going about their business...my favourite hobby, people watching! I hear a high pitched squeaking and look over the where Ol has a guinea pig by the neck and Ian's telling him to put it back down. Shortly after this guinea pigs near death experience Ol and Ian leave the pen and head to the bouncy castle. Ol jumps in and as I'm gazing into the distance as familiar sound fills the air, Ol's blood curdling screams! Oh god, he is out of that bouncy castle quicker than he got in! This then continues for about 15 minutes, hes in and out of there like a mad man. The definition of a love hate relationship! He scrambles out for the last time and Ian tells him we are leaving, well the boss is not pleased at all. I tell him that we can go to the park down the road for a play. Ian insists that its too far to walk. We tell him we will find a park on 'the way home' thinking he will definitely be asleep by then! No need for a play! Ha! We have this parenting gig all worked out!

"PLAY! PLAY! PLAY! PLAY! PLAY!" It's like a broken record, allll the way down the hill until we find a park. Ol beams as he spots the play equipment in the distance. Unfortunately for him it's difficult to get to and we get have to drive around a few back streets and get stuck in a cul-de-sac before FINALLY reaching utopia! Sweet relief! After a 10 minute play Ian carries a wailing Oli back to the car, lucky for me I packed the Peppa pig cookies!! PEPPA saves the day again! Ol happily munches away and talks to his bikkies all the way home.

7 hours later and here I am sitting here with TWO babies tucked up in their beds sleeping. This is officially the best time of my day! I would fill you in on the last 7 hours but quite frankly I can't really remember much of it! Probably a little something like this...boob, cuppa, abc kids, nap, boob, cuppa, bike ride, cuppa, cook dinner, boob, dinner, play, boob, shower, bed, cuppa and FREEEEEE TIME! Remember in school when you had free time and it was the best thing ever?! Well come 730 in our house it's free time and we do whatever the heck we please and it is SO SWEET. Except tonight it won't be as sweet because I won't be eating half my weight in chocolate like last night. I have learnt the error of my ways. Tomorrow I hope to sleep in as LONG AS POSSIBLE. It's Ian's last day of HOLIDAYS and I hope to have a beautiful sleep in because come Tuesday morning at 645am it's going to be just mama and her babes and for some reason I don't think I'm going to be sleeping in till my usual 830am. I'm ready for the challenge! Bring it ON!